What’s killing modern marriages?
I recently witnessed a couple who I had attended their wedding call it quits even before clocking 365 days. I mean I found this to be weird but it the reality on the ground.
People are getting divorced in less than 3 months after tying the knot. So what is the problem?
Is it that we have become impatient people or are we just getting married because everyone else is getting married?
When our older generation disagreed, they used a more reconciliatory approach to work out their differences hence divorce or separation was at its lowest. Can we borrow a leaf from this?
Here are some reasons why we can sustain our marriages as long as we would like.
Modern couples tend to work a lot. This happens at the expense of their sex lives. People get up go to work and don’t think about each other and when they come back later on in the night, they are too tired to do anything.
This can continue for sometimes and before they realize it, they are strangers to each other. Marriage without sex loses its meaning.
Less sex also insinuates that a partner might start cheating because they will want their sexual needs met and if that’s not done, then they are bound to cheat.
There is nothing as bad as couples comparing themselves to their friends. You can be the best of friends but you both got different lives. You cannot achieve everything at the same time everyone got their own and perfect timing.
So instead of wanting to drive a big car as your friend, take your kids to an expensive school as your friend and live in posh estate as your friend, you need to think twice and get your priorities right.
To avoid a lot of issues and argument with your spouse, love each other and live your own lives at your pace.
Nurture and cherish what you have.
Also Read: @I’m not a home wreaker: Juma Jux
Lack of transition
Most people that are currently getting married are doing it for the wrong reasons. Marriage is not dating, so some of the things that you used to do when dating has to go.
Most marriages are failing because there is no transition because they don’t know what is expected of them. The moment that you take your vows and sign the marriage certificate, for men, you need to start behaving like a husband and for the women, you need to behave like a wife.
You can’t go partying like you used to do and for men, you need to start providing for your family.
Too much dishonesty
The other reason why families are being broken is because there is too much dishonesty in these marriages.
Back in the days our parents gladly shared their bank accounts details with their spouses. They made investments together hence transparency.
Recently a man just found out that the house that he had been paying rent on actually belonged to his wife who also lives in the same house. The story ends with the lady being divorced by the husband.
The question is, why should you stay in a union or agree to marry a person that you don’t trust?
If you decide to get married trust that person if you can’t do that, then don’t marry them.
Charline Carren is a blogger and an editor at Tech for Development. A trained Public Relations and communication specialist.
My passion for writing stems from the need to always provide solutions to peoples problems and sharing my opinion with my readers. I’m a proud content creator, communication and media strategies developer and a great public speaker.